How to Serve and Grow Rich


richHow to Serve and Grow Rich

Most people try to move toward wealth in embarrassing, clumsy ways. They have cynicism programmed into them from an early age. So they want a course called Manipulate and Grow Rich, or Network and Grow Rich or Win People Over and Grow Rich.

They see companies like Apple, Amazon, Nordstrom, Whole Foods, Southwest Airlines, Google (and even this sublime Academy for Optimal Living) and think “I need a big, clever idea like that!” or “I need diabolically opportunistic branding and positioning!” When that doesn’t work, they think then it’s time to suck up to powerful people…polish some apples and lick some boots! Why? Because It’s Who You Know that makes you rich!

Yet all the while there is a spirit that runs through all radical wealth creation… and we will keep it simple by calling it service. Amazon sought a way to profoundly serve people and succeeded. All the individuals and companies I have worked with in the past 30 years of my coaching and training (and entrepreneurial) life revealed to me this underlying truth: wealth comes from profound service. (Even though the media, with shows like American Greed and Sixty Minutes give the opposite impression: they suggest to you that wealth comes from people taking advantage of other people.)

This course is designed to reverse whole lifetimes of misguided programming. It will present dynamic new and big ideas for creating wealth in your life and for feeling good about it as well.

The Top 10 Big Ideas

1. Eliminate Rejection Stories

Take rejection off the table. Do not have any such thing in your world. There is no rejection in reality, (it’s not like air or water,) it’s just a sad story about a neutral event. Do not have your professional life be about being accepted or being rejected. Have it be a grand game…an ongoing experiment.

Experiments never fail. They just yield new and useful information.

Someone doesn’t want your service or product? That’s more than okay. Once you disarm the emotional story you place inside “rejection” you become joyfully fearless. You actually seek what was once “rejection.” My friend the designer Peleg Top lives by this motto: “Rejection is my protection.”

2. Replace Pleasing with Serving

We are conditioned from the age of toddler to please others. We are praised for being pleasing. We are programmed very deeply by parents and society to please. And only to please. (Notice how parents always praise this way: “You were very GOOD in the store today! You were so good at Grandma’s!” This always means that you were sweet, passive, obedient and didn’t say much. Never did we hear: “You were courageous today! You were really expressing yourself!”)

As we move into adulthood we automatically, out of default and habituation, keep trying to please. Therefore our products and services tend to be focus-grouped into mediocrity. Our daily communications are devoid of bold requests and astonishing acts of service. We try, in the most predictably inoffensive ways we know of, to achieve customer satisfaction. And in its worst form this leads to the most vulgar personal fraudulence (the overly chummy used car salesman).

True service makes a difference in another person’s life and it also leads to wealth. When I think in terms of difference-making instead of pleasing, I am ready to also commit to customer astonishment instead of customer satisfaction.

3. Lighten Your Heart

Endless studies from sports to business to medicine show that people in a good mood perform better than people in a bad mood.

A good mood raises your consciousness and expands your imagination and energy. Therefore it is unintelligent to be doing things in your work (and moneymaking) life that are not fun. The great pro football player Fran Tarkenton said, “If it’s not fun, you’re not doing it right.” It pays (literally) to be aware of the intelligence of fun.

4. Choose Transformation Over Information

Most people take a class, read a book or listen to an audio program because they always think they need more information. In my years of coaching and training others (and experimenting on myself) I have found that information is almost never what is missing: transformation is. The mind that understands this takes a course (like this one) inside the inquiry How Can I Use This? The mind that has no understanding takes a course inside this inquiry: How Much of This Do I Already Know?

When my clients say, “I don’t know how to…” whatever, I know they are leading me and themselves down a false trail. The “how to” is never what’s really missing. The “want to” is what is missing. Once we see that, we can transform our inquiry and our immediate creative actions. We can increase the “want to” because desire is not a fixed state… it is a fire that can be fed.

5. Let Your Body Lead the Way

Whenever I have a major goal to hit I ask myself “What will be my physical equivalent?” Because if my body is not going to be as challenged as my mind is, reaching the goal is going to be a real struggle.

When the billionaire entrepreneur Richard Branson was asked by students, “How can we become more productive?” he surprised everyone by answering, “Work out more.” The more oxygen flowing to the brain, the more brilliant your ideas for serving others.

6. Create Agreements, Not Expectations

Expectations belong in the recycle bin along with rejection. To fully serve and grow rich, you don’t need them anymore. In fact, they will slow you down and give you a life of disappointment and even a feeling of betrayal.

If you want someone to do something, create an agreement. Agreements are creative collaborations that honor both people. They are like a co-written song. Whereas expectations live in us like a cancer. Nothing good can come from them. This course teaches the structure of a powerful agreement.

7. Don’t Disagree with Anyone

If your mission is grand, you live to serve. You do not live to argue with morons, or even wise savants. Disagreement always leads to a lowering of consciousness and an unnecessary buzzkill. Notice how you feel in your stomach when you communicate something in all friendly innocence and someone shouts back, “I disagree!” It never feels good, because two people who were simply exchanging ideas have now become opponents.

Listen for the value in what someone else is saying before you communicate back. Listen for the merit. Do not listen as a prosecuting attorney would. Listen as a lover or poet or entrepreneurial genius would. Listen for the gold. This new approach will benefit you . . . especially in sales situations. When you have learned to agree with a prospect’s objection instead of “overcoming” it with a humiliating argument, you are much closer to making a sale.

Counter-intuitive? Yes. Paradoxical? Of course. Effective? You’ll crush it.

8. Delete All Beliefs About Money

People try to overwhelm all their negative beliefs about money (picked up in childhood from the money fears of their parents, or in adulthood from the fears inside the novels, movies, politics or the media) by hammering in new empowering beliefs and affirmations of abundance. But that makes the noise in one’s head even heavier. Like the music of Megadeth.

Because now the mind is a cluster-jam-session of old beliefs and new beliefs arguing away in revved-up ways every time any amount of money is being discussed. None of this is necessary. Go to neutral. Get clear and free. From a serene system of no-belief around money you are now free to serve and grow rich.

9. Stop Selling and Start Giving

If your product is good, give someone the experience of it. Don’t be stingy. Keep giving. Because what you give, you get.

If you have a natural tendency to think in terms of scarcity, you’ll shut down the inflow of wealth by choking off the outflow. As you’re more able to invest in your people and give yourself to the world, you’ll watch the money flow in and flow out, and you’ll move to wealth much faster.

As the great Russian spiritual teacher Gurdjieff said, “If you help others, you will be helped. Perhaps tomorrow, perhaps in a hundred years, but you will be helped. Nature must pay off the debt. It is a mathematical law and all life is mathematical.”

10. Sentence Yourself to a Good Life

Your words, your sentences and your language in your mind and in your conversations have a much bigger role in creating your future than anyone realizes. I will often change two (victim) words in a client’s email to a prospective customer and those two words change the response from no to yes.

We can speak as if we were owners of the human spirit, or we can speak like victims of circumstance. Those are the two fundamental languages we use. Owners say “get from” while victims say “get through.” Owners say what they will do, intend to do and choose to do something, while victims wonder what they “should” do. One is the language of creation, the other of reaction.

Owners create, victims react. Owners focus, victims spray. Owners use language to build their future with while victims use language to describe the past. Owners use the word commitment as a tool to achieve things with, while victims think commitment is a feeling that comes and goes. We will explore how victims can become owners. We will see that it harmonizes beautifully with serving and growing rich.

(Source: Steve Chandler)

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